Breaking the Mold: Letting My Children Shine in a World Full of Expectations

Growing up, I was often told, “You’re too hyper, too silly. You’re not acting like a lady. Sit still. Be quiet. Be mature.” If I’m honest, a part of me still struggles to speak up for myself in certain situations because I was always expected to change—to fit into a mold someone else created for me. Whether their reasons were rooted in religion or simply what they thought was ‘best’ for me, I made a conscious decision to parent differently.

Instead of asking my children to conform to what I think is right, I teach them about safe spaces, good people, and how to recognize when it’s time to be that authentic version of themselves. I encourage their creativity—art supplies can always be replaced. I teach them to be loud, be silly, speak up for themselves, and spread joy like it’s contagious. Most importantly, I remind them to stay true to who they are and never dim their light to make others feel more comfortable.

When my girls started on this little project, it was just a stack of bricks. Then they asked if they could do more, and I said absolutely—why not? Cleaning up would take 20 minutes, but the memories would last a lifetime. The world is always changing, and while I can’t protect them from everything, I can ensure that the moments we share, while they are under my care, are some of the best. They loved creating, but they also enjoyed the process of cleaning up afterward.

As Miss Frizzle says, “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy.” But as a mother, I say: “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy, fall down, but always get back up.” As long as God grants you another day, there is a purpose yet to be fulfilled.